REVIEW: God Hates Astronauts #7

(Image Comics, 2015)

Written by Ryan Browne & Charles Soule
Artwork by Aaron Conley
Color Artwork by Jordan Boyd

I don’t even know where to begin with this comic, the randomness that is God Hates Astronauts will keep readers both entertained and on the look out for the next over the top page. This book is filled with strange creatures, super heroes, adult language and my personal favorite, PUNS! If none of this appeals to you, especially the puns, this book isn’t for you; also you don’t like fun.

God Hates Astronauts is set in an alternate world where the president has Mount Rushmore for a head, alien creatures have crabs for heads and the king tiger in space is named “King Tiger Eating a Cheeseburger”. There is a justice league like entity in this universe, The Power Persons Five, but they fell apart fairly easy. The superman character, Star Fighter, is a drunken narcissist with a strange hobby of collecting “vintage” Big Johnson t-shirts. After he loses his head it’s replaced with that of a floating ghost cow head; see, very random stuff here. After King Tiger Eating a Cheesburger’s son is killed when redneck astronauts crash into his space ship, an all out invasion is sent to earth.  Crab people, robotic tigers and super heroes do battle on earth in comically violent scenes. I know it seems like a vague overview but the one thing this book does is keep the reader guessing by throwing randomness at you, it has to be seen to understand.

This issue sees galactic super beings from a planet named Super Gentendo 64 steal the baby of Star Fighter and Starrior. The beings explain that the super powered infant is the upgrade for their planet and that plugging her into the Master System will save their world. Starrior and Time Giraffe set out to rescue her child and even introduce time travel to this jam-packed world. It really doesn’t do any justice to this book to summarizing each issue, there’s so much going on and flash backs pop up multiple times, each issue just throws so much information at you.

There isn’t really much to say about this title that’ll help convey what happens in this book. It is the most random, over the top, confusing book that I read, and that’s why I love it. You never know what’s going to happen next, all new developments are so out of left field you have to chuckle at them.  Each issue has to be read multiple times, and to me, that’s more bang for your buck. All the strange characters are over the top, weary over the top. The Anti Mugger has three arms, Detective Charles Lebronson is pretty much Charles Bronson in a basketball uniform, and there’s even an owl astronaut named Buzz Owldrin. The onomatopoeia in this book is hilarious! No “pow” will be found here, what you will find is super obvious sound effects that will make you laugh at how fitting they are. A stern finger point from an angry character is enhanced with  “interrogate”; or simply the word “gone” when a character teleports. Little details like this are why I love this book; it’s jammed with jokes like this. The writing and artwork fits perfectly together, I really can’t see this story with anything other than the colorful exaggerated characters. This whole world just seems like a fever dream of some kid who happens to also have a pension on bad language, and that’s more reasons to love this book.  Check this book out for a break from the super intricate, serious stories that seem to be dominating the big publishers. Just make sure you take your Adderall first, you’ll need it.

image-2Lewis is nerd from Baltimore that is forced to work when he’d much rather spend his time reading comics, playing video games and getting fat.

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